I was listening to Ray Higdon talking earlier about preparing your mind for success and even though it's something I've heard before in different context, it really hit home to me today.
The person you want to be is never going to happen UNTIL you've been through the challenges and changes you need to go through, to grow mentally into that person who can truly appreciate what you've become.
We all take hits. Life throws us punches and we sometimes have no choice than to get hit. But we can resent those punches and moan how it's not fair and we didn't deserve it and bang on about everything we could have done differently...stay there remembering what it's like to get hit OR we can take it as a lesson and own it. Say yeah, I actually needed that to teach me something.
I think there are times in life where we feel hard done by and that we resent situations or even other people.
I truly believe that we when allow ourselves to envy others and blame circumstances without facing up to the fact that we have to take ownership of situations, even though it feels like we are not at fault, we can't grow to the next level.
Can you relate to this?
Have you looked at someone else and said its ok for them, it was easy for them?
Have you been angry at someone else for upsetting you?
Have you ever done something that you regret and then blamed circumstances?
I know I have and it can eat away at you.
One of the reasons I tend to have a sensible attitude to drinking and not go crazy is that when I was in my 20s I used to be designated driver most of the time and rarely drank alcohol.
BUT on the few occasions I did, I would go crazy and get absolutely blitzed. I remember one day the embarrassment of my Dad having to get the milk in one morning (remember those days!) and there was a zip lock bag next to the milk on the doorstep with my bank cards, lipstick, condoms, loose change, placed next to my shoes.
The milkman had kindly collected the evidence of my night out as he'd walked up the long driveway......the problem is my Dad was also the owner of the Dairy, so I imagine it was embarrassing for him that his daughter was probably the butt of a few jokes between his staff.
Worse still about that 21st Birthday night out and what i never told my parents was that I remember on that night, getting a Taxi home. The reason my bag was emptied out up the driveway was because when the Taxi pulled up and I started to fish around in a state for cash to pay the Cab Driver, he reached across and started groping me as I was in the front seat....I went crazy of course, punched the crap out of him (landed a decent one in his face I think) and managed to get out of the cab and run up our long driveway, find my keys, drop everything else and get inside.
It felt pretty shitty for lots of reasons. For a while I thought because I was wearing practically just a crop top and hotpants ( it was the 90s don't judge me and I used to podium dance!) It was my fault.
Obviously it wasn't, the taxi driver was a prick and just saw his chance to take advantage of a young, drunk girl. It could have been way, way worse.
But noone forced me to get into that state. That was my choice! I told myself that I deserved to go out now and again and get shitfaced to blow off steam as I was usually driving....but really I was back living at home, after becoming newly single and I was enjoying myself without really thinking about the consequences. I was lucky. Very lucky.
I'm so grateful that I recognised it wasnt my fault, but also that it was like a warning which I very much heeded and after that I was alot more careful.
But it didn't stop me having some great nights out of course and I saw it as a lesson that just allowed me to make choices about my own behaviour. I knew from then on that if I was going to have a wild night, I could actually still do it without getting off my face, because at least that way I was in control.
Much love x